Tag Archives: Jokes

MBA Vs Engineer.

An MBA and an Engineer go on a camping trip,

set up their tent, and fall asleep.

Some hours later, the Engineer wakes his MBA friend.

“Look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

The MBA replies, “I see millions of stars.”

“What does that tell you?”

The MBA ponders for a minute. “Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are

millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.

Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.

Theologically, it’s evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.

Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

Economically there are mass scales of stars in the sky.

So “Economy of Scale ” would be the ideal strategy in that market.

Strategically such market would be a volume driven market

Financially it would be a low margin market.

From HR point of view we would require huge manpower

What does it tell you?”

The Engineer is silent for a moment, then speaks.

“Practically”

“Someone has stolen our TENT”..:p

Chinese Calling To US.

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?

Operator (Chinese) : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller :
No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!

Operator : Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can speak to me. Who is this?

Caller : I’m Sam Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It’s urgent.

Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what’s this urgent matter about?

Caller : Well… just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.

Operator : Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn’t an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don’t have time for this!

Caller :
You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator :
I’m Saw Ree.

Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

Operator : That’s what I said. I’m Saw Ree!

Glad to see you smiling..

Jokes Of The Day.

Common sense wich teachers lack…..

MATHS Teacher :”How can you distribute 8 apples
among 6 people equally….??”

Student: “By Making Juice”
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Thought of the day:
Laziness is mother of all bad habits…

But ultimately
She is a mother
So we should respect her!!
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TEACHER: How do you spell “crocodile?”

STUDENT: K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L

TEACHER: No, that’s wrong.

STUDENT: Maybe it’s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

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Jokes Of The Day.

Impact of Job Change:

A taxi passenger touched d driver on shoulder to ask something

Driver screamed, lost control of the car, went up on the footpath & Stopped few centimeters from a shop

The driver said:
“Don’t ever do that again, u scared me”

Passenger apologized n said:
“I didn’t realize a little touch would scare u so much”

Driver replied:
“Sorry, it’s not your fault
its my 1st day as a Cab driver.I’ve been driving a van carrying dead bodies for last 25 yrs.
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If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments…

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Museum Administrator: Thatโ€™s a 500 year old statue you have broken.

Santa: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

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3 Ways To Catch A Tiger

1- Newtons Method
Allow The Tiger To Catch U & Catch The Tiger

2- Einsteins Method
Chase The Tiger Until It Becomes Tired
Then Catch It

3- My Method
Catch A Cat & Beat It
Until It Accepts Its A Tiger :D:D:D

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Jokes Of The Day.

Funny Truth-

No one is as ugly as their driving license/ identity card picture,
.
.
.
.
.
Nor as good-looking as their Facebook profile pic..!
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Height Of Confidence :

Once Many Professors Were Called And Asked To Sit In An Aeroplane
After They Sat, They Were Informed That The Plane Is Made By Their Students.
All Of Them Ran N Got Out Of Plane Expect One
People Asked Him The Reason He Said, If Its Made By My Students, IT WONT EVEN START !! ๐Ÿ˜›

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If animals have Facebook, these are most likely to be their Status Updates:

Cockroach: Managed to skip from some oneโ€™s foot step.. Man, I lead a dangerous lifestyle! ๐Ÿ˜›

Chicken: If tomorrow I am not updating my status, means I am being served at KFC. Love you all โ™ฅ

Octopus: I have just refilled my ink..horray!! ^_^

Goat : Friends, donโ€™t go out, Eid holiday is coming ๐Ÿ˜ฅ
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Wikipedia: I know everything

Google: I have everything

Facebook: I know evertbody

Internet: Without me u are nothing

..

..

..

Electricity: Keep Talking…………..

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HEIGHT OF BRANDING:
A rich girl was walking by the river in the jungle & suddenly saw a crocodile.
.
.
.
She screamed:OH MY GOD… “LACOSTE”
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Jokes Of The Day.

Professor:Chemical symbol of Barium?
John : BA

Professor:For sodium?
John: NA

Professor:What will we get if 1 atom of BA
& 2 atoms of NA combined?
John: BANANA

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3 men were talking…..
first man – “books influence us a lot……
when my wife was expecting,
she read THE TALE OF TWO CITIES and she gave birth to twins….”

second man – “yes, you are right.. when my wife was expecting, she
read THE THREE MUSKETEERS
and she gave birth to triplets….”

Hearing this, the third man fainted….
when he regained his senses, the other two men asked
him what happened…..
The third man replied…
“my wife is expecting and she is reading
ALI BABA AND THE
FORTY THIEVES” ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

——————————————-
father to son: hey why don’t u go and study?
son: what for?
father: u’ll get good marks

son: then?

father: u’ll get good salary

son: then?

father: u’ll get big house and a car

son: then?

father: u’ll relax

son: what do u think i am doing right now….
———————————————–

teacher to student : If u give 100$ 2 ur friend but he needs only 50$,so how much will he return u ?

Student : Nothing

Teacher : u dont know maths ?

Student : u dont know my friends…. ๐Ÿ˜›
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